29 Reasons Why You Should Never EVER Consider Setting Foot In Manchester

A disgusting place – its people should be ashamed

Beatstreet

Manchester. It’s a pretty poor excuse of a city really.

Lonely Planet named it in the top 10 cities to visit in the world this year. But why? Really, it’s just a bit of a mess and it’s pretty dead.

We’d advise you to just stay at home instead. You’ll probably get more excitement from watching the grass grow in your front yard.

And why?

1. Well, for a start it just looks terrible

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2. Take for example the Great Northern Warehouse – utterly deserted and left to ruin

3. I mean, it's not exactly Hollywood material, is it?

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4. Don’t even get me started on those hideous canals

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5. There's just no escaping this concrete jungle

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6. And having the Peak District on your door step is just plain irritating

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7. The night life is still incredibly dull

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8. There’s clearly no culture to speak of at all, in fact

9. And sport? What sport?

10. The music scene is quite simply non-existent

I mean, who even ARE Oasis? Or The Smiths. Or The Stone Roses. Or Joy Division. Or New Order. Or James. Or Everything Everything.

1 Oasis

11. And Coronation Street isn’t exactly a big deal, right?

12. And I wouldn’t bother looking through the markets. Not much to see there.

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13. The restaurants aren't up to much either. The 'curry mile'? Pah. Never even heard of it.

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14. Nor is there anywhere nice to go for a drink

15. Or do your shopping

Arndale

16. Especially at Christmas

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17. Rainy day options are strictly limited

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18. And the city hasn’t really achieved anything

19. The buskers are nothing to write home about

20. In fact, across the board there’s no imagination to speak of

21. And too many DAMN hipsters

22. The people are so unwelcoming

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23. While there’s nothing worse than having too many coffee shops to choose from

Each of them equally lovely and relaxing. UGH.

24. The weather, of course, is just vile

Always.

25. And the graffiti! Pure vandalism, nothing more.

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26. And nobody's figured out what the hell to do with all those old buildings

Odeon

27. So obviously it’s completely irrelevant that the BBC moved here

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28. And that it’s called the ‘Capital of the North’

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29. Basically, just don’t bother coming. It’s totally not worth it

Really.

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Written By

Ciara Hanstock

Bit of a traveller and lover of all things outdoors-y. Although you'll usually catch me devouring chocolate, which doesn't sit too well with the New Year's resolution!

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